Chapter 11#

[OP] Just Registered A Random Account Posting Time: 2017-02-03 22:31:09

Two days later, Brother Egg called me.

He asked cautiously if he could come to see me. I guessed Pei Hao called him to plead for him.

“Brother Egg, you reminded me before that the one Pei Hao likes is not me,” I couldn’t block Brother Egg like I blocked Pei Hao, so I could only explain to him slowly, “You saw what happened in the sea that day. From beginning to end, he only loved Fu Yan. It’s impossible for me to continue living with him.”

Brother Egg was silent for a while on the other end of the phone, not speaking, probably thinking about whether he should persuade me or not.

“Actually, you have been watching for so many years, you have already seen it clearly, haven’t you?” I continued, “You all know clearly in your hearts that I am just a spare tire for Fu Yan in Pei Hao’s heart.”

Brother Egg remained silent and didn’t reply. If I were Pei Hao’s friend, I would also be too embarrassed to continue the conversation.

“I don’t understand what madness he has been up to recently. Probably he can’t accept the fact that I dumped him instead of him dumping me,” I leaned against the sofa, my tone flat but feeling uncomfortable inside, “If I chose to continue living with him, then the fact that he saved Fu Yan instead of me at the critical moment of life and death would be a knife stabbed in my heart. I can never forget it in my life.”

“Pei Hao is an idiot in this matter,” Brother Egg said in a tone of hating iron for not becoming steel, “So when he called me today, I scolded him for a full half hour.”

Brother Egg paused and continued: “But he kept saying he didn’t know the other person who fell into the water was you at that time. I believe him on this point.”

“The point is not whether he knew I fell into the water or not. The point is that his eyes only have Fu Yan.” I frowned. No matter how many times this matter is mentioned, I will feel uncomfortable in my heart.

“Sigh,” Brother Egg sighed deeply and said helplessly, “I understand what you mean. I will convey it to him. I won’t persuade you anymore.”

“Xiaoxi, I can’t control the matter between Pei Hao and you, but I still like you as a friend very much. If you don’t mind that I am Pei Hao’s good friend, you can still contact me if you have anything in the future. I will definitely help as much as I can. Hope our friendship won’t break.” Since Brother Egg said this, he naturally understood my determination.

I was a bit moved on this side. Brother Egg has always taken good care of me. In the past, when Pei Hao didn’t care about me, I knew he had spoken for me explicitly and implicitly several times.

I nodded quickly on this side and said: “Okay, you can also find me if you have anything in the future. Thank you for taking care of me these past few years.”

Hanging up the phone, I spaced out on the sofa for a while, and thought about the recent events in fragments.

Pei Hao’s recent reaction can be said to be somewhat unexpected to me. I never thought he would behave, how to say, so caring about me. Checking the elevator video one moment, blocking Dabai the next, calling my sister and then calling Brother Egg.

I thought about it carefully and felt there were two reasons. One is that Pei Hao’s life has been too smooth. Wealthy family background, outstanding appearance, and he himself is motivated and striving. So I dare not say he got whatever he wanted since childhood, but he definitely had many more choices and opportunities than children from ordinary families. I think the biggest stumble in Pei Hao’s life was on Fu Yan. For other things he wanted, basically he just needed to reach out his hand, or at most put in a little effort to get them. So he cannot allow me €€€€ a person more ordinary than him who chased his footsteps for five years €€€€ to suddenly abandon him. His years of experience and self-esteem do not allow it.

The second reason is that I was really good to him these past few years. He can’t give up this kind of goodness. Maybe many people have secretly or openly loved Pei Hao, but I don’t know how many of them can be like me, queuing all night in the freezing winter to buy the basketball game tickets he wanted. When his passport was missing the day before his business trip abroad, I rummaged through boxes and cabinets at home until 3 am to find it for him, and went to work with panda eyes the next day. When it was his birthday, I was on a business trip out of town, took a plane at night to accompany him for his birthday, and flew back in the early morning… Maybe these things are just a way for many couples to express love, sounding pretentious if said too much. It’s just that sometimes I think, no matter who I fall in love with next, I won’t have the passion to do such things again. I gave all my most intense love to Pei Hao.

And Pei Hao has become accustomed to my silent dedication for five years. Suddenly taking away someone who poured their heart out to him for five years, he can’t get used to it.

In the evening, I turned on the computer and found that the company had replied to me, agreeing to transfer me back to City X, provided that I finish the project here first. I calculated the time, it would take about a month. According to the doctor, my leg would be almost healed by then, just in time to go back and see my sister.

I called Dabai to confirm if Pei Hao had pestered him these past few days. Dabai said my call really worked, and he hadn’t seen Pei Hao since then.

I thought it made sense. Pei Hao has always been three-minute hot towards me. Occasionally showing that he loved me to death was just a whim.

This time Pei Hao’s enthusiasm lasted less than a week. Not getting my reply, sure enough, he felt bored and meaningless. I wasn’t surprised.

True feelings or fake intentions, time will naturally explain everything.

[1st Floor] mingo: So Scumbag Pei really didn’t chase anymore?

[2nd Floor] Old Times sati: Scumbag Pei definitely chased again, otherwise why would this post be called “How can I get rid of him”.

[3rd Floor] Timing: Actually, I still haven’t figured out Pei Hao’s sudden change of style. Wasn’t he always not very caring about Xiaoxi? Why suddenly so infatuated? I’m so confused (€€°Д°).

[4th Floor] XOXO: Come, person above, let me explain to you. There is a law called human nature is inherently cheap. In the past, Xiaoxi always treated Pei Hao well without asking for anything in return. Pei Hao got used to it and took it for granted, so he didn’t take Xiaoxi seriously. But when Pei Hao suddenly realized Xiaoxi was leaving, note that this time he was really leaving, and he also felt that this breakup was different from previous quarrels. Whether it’s what Xiaoxi said about self-esteem not allowing it, or getting used to Xiaoxi’s goodness to him, or realizing that he really has feelings for Xiaoxi, no matter which point it is, Pei Hao couldn’t accept it for a while.

…………

[9th Floor] Fuel Saving Grocery Store: Brother Egg, as a bystander of the whole process, gave up persuading Xiaoxi. We readers naturally follow Brother Egg’s footsteps.

…………

[17th Floor] Heart Five Kui: Just want to sigh, Brother Egg is really nice~~

[OP] Just Registered A Random Account Posting Time: 2017-02-06 22:31:09

During the time I had the cast at home, I tried to catch up on dramas, digging out all the dramas I wanted to watch but didn’t have time to watch before. But I found it hard to get into them, always abandoning them after watching one or two episodes. Maybe because I was in a bad mood.

I tried playing games again. During the five years Pei Hao and I were together, we spent a lot of time playing games together. As soon as I logged into the game account, I saw a pile of messages accumulated by Pei Hao over those few days swarming in. At first, he asked where I was and wanted to find me. In the middle, a few messages turned into Xiaoxi I was wrong, forgive me okay. Later it turned into I really have nothing with Fu Yan, the one I like is you. He didn’t send much every day, just two or three messages. I guess he was also afraid that I would block his game account again.

Really making the best use of everything.

I logged out of the game account and logged into a smurf account that didn’t add Pei Hao. After being pitted by teammates for a few rounds, I quit. Many people asked me what advantages Pei Hao has and why I like him so much. Is being very good at playing games an advantage? If saying he plays basketball well has an appearance bonus, then he is genuinely good at playing a certain game. When playing one-on-one with him, I basically always lose. Being teammates with him is just one word: safe. Winning or losing doesn’t matter, anyway, he is there to hold the fort.

He would also stream a few games when he had time, and he had fans.

That game was introduced to me by Pei Hao, or rather I actively learned it to have a common topic with him. From that time until now, I haven’t played that game again. To delete a person and all memories related to him requires ruthlessness and thoroughness, pulling up by the roots.

On the weekend, Dabai came to accompany me to the hospital for a follow-up visit. Actually, it was just a casual look and some medicine prescribed. The doctor said the bone was set well. As long as I don’t fall or hit it, it can heal in a month. After resting at home for a week, my foot didn’t hurt as much as at the beginning when I walked with crutches. Dabai was finally relieved.

Having been cooped up at home for a week, it was hard to get some fresh air. I didn’t want to go home and eat takeout, so I asked Dabai to take me out for dinner. Seeing that I was indeed suffocated, Dabai drove me to eat at a very famous hot pot restaurant. While eating hot pot, a kid at the next table was particularly cute. He kept looking at the cast on my foot. While his mom went to the toilet, he ran over and asked me if I was an Iron Armor Warrior. I said brother is not a warrior, just injured his leg.

He bent down and blew a few breaths on my foot, saying: “Brother, I pass my power to you, so you won’t hurt anymore.”

I smiled and touched his head, suddenly thinking that there are so many cute people and things in this world. Why was I trapped in a world called Pei Hao for the past five years and couldn’t get out? Although love is precious, life is more valuable.

Might as well let me start over by myself.

It was already past 9 pm when we went home after dinner. Dabai and I came out of the elevator and saw a blurred figure squatting at my door. I was startled at first. Walking closer, who else could it be but Pei Hao?

“Xiaoxi…” Seeing me, Pei Hao immediately came up, looking at me eagerly, saying: “Has your anger subsided?”

Subsided what anger? He still doesn’t understand. This is not something that can pass by bowing his head and admitting a mistake. I am completely disappointed in him and this relationship.

I pretended not to see him, walked past him, and reached out to take out the key.

Pei Hao suddenly hugged me from behind, lowered his head and rested it on my shoulder, whispering my name.

“Uh…” Dabai scratched his hair on the side and said awkwardly, “Well, I have something to do and leave first. You guys chat slowly.”

After speaking, he ran into the elevator like a gust of wind.

My hand that just took out the key stopped stiffly in mid-air. I asked Pei Hao: “How did you find this place?”

“I…” Pei Hao hesitated for a moment, but still told the truth: “I’ve been having someone follow Dabai these past few days.”

I reached out to pry his hands off my body, smiling sarcastically: “Next, are you planning to track me and monitor my phone calls?”

“No…” Pei Hao hugged tighter, saying as if very aggrieved: “You refused to see me, so I had to find a way to see you.”

I said coldly: “How many times do you want me to say, I…”

“Xiaoxi,” Pei Hao interrupted me, turned my body to face him. By the dim light in the corridor, I saw his unshaven face, looking a bit haggard.

Pei Hao looked at me seriously and said: “What you minded before, what you cared about, what I didn’t do well, whatever dissatisfaction you have, let’s make it all clear today. I will change everything in the future, okay?”

I stared at him and shook my head. I felt I had already made everything clear before.

“Sorry Xiaoxi, I only knew from Brother Egg a few days ago that you cried in the sea that day,” Pei Hao reached out wanting to touch my face, but I pushed it away. He said hoarsely, “But you can’t keep everything in your heart. Only when you say it out loud do I know what you want. I’d rather you lose your temper at me.”

“Did I never say it out loud? I even went to stay in a hotel for a few days,” my eyes darkened, and a sarcastic smile curled up at the corner of my mouth: “And what did you do? Did you call me once during the days I was out?”

“Xiaoxi, Xiaoxi, it was my fault for not contacting you that time. I’m sorry to you,” Pei Hao’s tone was a bit urgent, “But that time we just had a nice meal, I didn’t understand why you suddenly lost your temper.”

As Pei Hao spoke, his tone wilted: “And that time I knew, you didn’t really want to break up…”

“Yeah, anyway I can’t compare to Fu Yan, not worth your coaxing.” I leaned weakly against the wall, feeling my leg was a bit tired standing and talking like this.

Pei Hao quickly supported me, snatched my key to open the door, and carried me onto the living room sofa.

Pei Hao went out to close the door, came back and sat beside me, explaining softly: “No, Xiaoxi.”

“I never told you before. Fu Yan has a long scar on his back. Once in junior high school on the way home from school, we were robbed. Actually, it would have been fine if we just handed over the money obediently, but I insisted on fighting them. Who knew they had a knife? One slashed at me, and as a result, he blocked it for me. He lost a lot of blood at that time. If I hadn’t been so impulsive then, he could definitely have avoided this cut. So, I always feel I owe him, and treat him better than others.”

“Fu Yan doesn’t think this matter is my fault, nor does he want me to have any psychological burden, so he never mentions this matter. He also told me there is no need to tell others. This happened a long time ago, so I never said it. Even Brother Egg doesn’t know.”

“I suddenly feel now that I should have told you earlier, lest you overthink.”

That scar on Fu Yan’s back, I did see it on the island. It was very long. Although the texture of the scar had faded a lot after so many years, I could still imagine the pain at that time.

Pei Hao is really lucky. Everyone close to him treats him well.

“So what?” I stared straight into Pei Hao’s eyes and questioned, “Dare you say you never loved him? Dare you say that for these five years you felt I was more important than him?”

Pei Hao was stunned. After a long time, he came back to his senses and whispered something I didn’t hear clearly, with a look of guilt on his face.

Forget it, why am I persistently asking? Whether he loved or not is not important now. Anyway, this relationship between him and me has long ended.

“You go.” I pointed to the door of the house and said tiredly, “I’m going to sleep.”

“Xiaoxi…” Pei Hao was anxious, looking at me nervously, “I might have indeed liked him before. I myself couldn’t figure out if my feelings for him were like or gratitude. But now I am very clear, the one I love is you. Since you left these few days, I have been thinking of you all the time. I can’t accept anyone else at all, nor can I accept you being with another person. You can’t not want me.”

As Pei Hao spoke, he grabbed my hand, staring at me with light in his eyes, murmuring in my ear: “I love you Xiaoxi, the one I love is you.”

I pulled my fingers out of his hand one by one, and said in a muffled voice: “Pei Hao, you had five years to say this sentence, but you chose to say it now.”

Pei Hao’s eyes dimmed, looking at me with some confusion.

“You wouldn’t have failed to notice that you never said the three words ‘I love you’ to me in these five years, right?” I smiled.

Great, every time I see you Pei Hao, in the end, I’m just asking for trouble myself.

Before Pei Hao could reply, I spoke again lightly: “Then let me tell you, it’s too late to say it now. I don’t love you anymore.”

Pei Hao’s body suddenly pressed towards me with great strength, hurting my bones a bit. He fixed the back of my head and kissed me forcefully. I pushed him away with force, but he kissed down again regardless. We struggled and pushed for a few minutes, finally ending with me slapping him hard.

When Pei Hao looked up again, the corners of his eyes were red, and a mist of water appeared in his eyes.

“Xiaoxi…” As soon as Pei Hao opened his mouth, his voice was trembling.

I gasped for a few breaths, pointed to the door again, and said word by word: “I don’t want to see you, go.”

Pei Hao blinked slightly, and a tear of moderate size slid down. For so many years, it was the first time I saw Pei Hao cry. Funny to say, it was actually for me. My heart seemed to be pricked by something, a bit painful. Unbelievable, the proud Pei Hao, the calm Pei Hao, would cry for me.

I pointed at him excitedly and shouted loudly: “Go!”

Pei Hao opened his mouth tremblingly, made no sound. After a moment, he walked out in a trance.

My head was splitting. I lay on the sofa and closed my eyes tiredly.

The reason I was so excited was that the moment I saw him cry, I actually still felt uncomfortable. I was afraid that if he stayed for one more second, crying and begging me to forgive him, I would soften my heart.

But fortunately, my weakness didn’t have time to be exposed before he left. I think my last slap really hit him. He won’t come again in the future.

[1st Floor] Jiao Jiao pony: No, he will come again in the future, Xiaoxi (Laughing and crying.jpg).

[2nd Floor] A Big Painter: I am really speechless about Scumbag Pei. Lived for so many years without knowing who he loves. Maybe after you reconcile with him, Xiaoxi, he will say sorry again, I found my true love is Fu Yan… So you can’t forgive him, understand? Understand? (Serious face.jpg).

[3rd Floor] Timing: Scumbag Pei actually has fans. Thinking about it makes my heart tremble. Handsome guys and pretty girls who follow game streams, please open your eyes and pay attention, don’t send money to the scumbag.

[4th Floor] Julie-rise: Does no one want to gossip about what kind of game streamer Pei Hao is? I’m so curious!

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[12th Floor] Don’t Know What To Give Give Me Lipstick: Xiaoxi, you actually softened your heart. I was so angry I ate ten fried chicken wings in one breath!!

[13th Floor] You Are Little Melon Skin: Hahaha person above, don’t make excuses for yourself!

[14th Floor] Jiang Si Fen: Sigh, generally scumbags are best at crying and begging for forgiveness, then someone will soften their heart and forgive, and finally repeat the same mistakes… OP, if you soften your heart and agree in the end, don’t open a post to complain when you suffer again. Don’t want to hear.

[15th Floor] Barca You Win For Once: Can’t say that either. There are indeed examples of scumbags turning into loyal dogs. There are some around me, just that the probability is indeed very small.

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[23rd Floor] Yi Shen You: WTF WTF, why do I feel like I’ve watched Pei Hao’s game stream? Amateur, not many fans, handsome. Calculating by time, that streamer didn’t stream in June, July, and August, exactly when Xiaoxi said they broke up!! Oh my god, let me calm down. Cannot equate my male god with Scumbag Pei!! Someone come and tell me it’s not, it’s not, right?

[24th Floor] Eva-reda: Person above, begging for private message of that streamer’s name!

[25th Floor] A Bi: Also begging, also begging.

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[31st Floor] Guo Bu Qing Ru: == Everyone calm down. There are plenty of amateur male game streamers. It’s normal to stop streaming for a few months in between. Don’t just say anyone looks like him, bringing trouble to Xiaoxi. And Xiaoxi definitely doesn’t want everyone to disturb their real life. We reading the post should just read the post properly, don’t cause trouble.