Chapter 75#

The Cross-dressing Wife#

The first time Master saw him, he said that this child was destined for great things.

However, “what is too rigid is easily broken.”

Gu Xingzhai thought this was a piece of advice for him not to be overly competitive or aggressive.

So he began to cultivate his character, speaking less and doing more, practicing his martial arts diligently. But Master shook his head, saying he hadn’t fully grasped the meaning. This “rigidity” didn’t just refer to his way of doing things, but also his personality—profound emotions do not last, and extreme brilliance leads to injury. Such a person would always live a very tired life.

But on this point, Gu Xingzhai did not agree with his Master.

In his view, daring to love and hate was not a bad thing. Since his father passed away, he had completely given up the idea of forming a family, preparing to wander the world with his junior brothers and revive the sect. It didn’t matter if he had no children in a hundred years; his junior brothers would marry and have children anyway, so there was no worry about having no one to provide for him in his old age.

But all his plans were disrupted by that demon named Lin Xiaodong.

Initially, Gu Xingzhai suspected him of being the murderer of his father, keeping a close watch and guarding against him at all times. But the youth acted as if he didn’t notice, continuing his life as usual. Every day he would provide free medical consultations, visit the theater, and occasionally go to the town market to buy some fresh gadgets to tinker with—his life was quite rich and colorful.

However, just like the other residents of Qingxie Town, Gu Xingzhai found that he could no longer move his gaze away from him.

Even when he tried desperately to stay away, that slender figure wearing a cheongsam would always unexpectedly appear in his mind, lingering. There was also the way the youth’s eyes curved when he smiled, his slender arms as white as lotus roots under the sunlight, and that focused and affectionate look when he gazed at him—undeniably, Gu Xingzhai felt pleasure in all of this.

Over the years, he had traveled far and wide and seen many beauties. A famous courtesan from Jiangnan, praised to the skies by wealthy merchants, had even personally invited him to a pleasure boat for a chat. But no matter how beautiful the face or how sweet the song, in Gu Xingzhai’s eyes, they were all but fleeting clouds.

Lin Xiaodong was different from them all.

The youth was wanton, bold, dared to challenge his authority, and was not stingy in expressing his affection. Being with him was like dancing on a blade’s edge—there was always endless fun. So much so that when Gu Xingzhai discovered he was actually a man, there was no displeasure in his heart from being deceived or offended. Instead, his first thought was that he could take this opportunity to tease him properly.

Of course, the result was that not only did he lose completely because of that single tear, but he was also almost scared out of his wits by the youth’s appearance of wanting to commit suicide with a blade. From then on, he never dared to entertain even a hint of a joking thought again.

There were naturally benefits: he finally crossed that hurdle in his heart and confirmed that Lin Xiaodong and he shared mutual feelings.

Next, he spent the happiest period of his life in Qingxie Town.

Whenever Gu Xingzhai put his arm around the youth’s waist, the thought “how can it be so thin” would always pop into his head, as if it would break with a snap. He willingly peeled crabs for Lin Xiaodong, took him on boat trips on the lake, and went to the market together—though it was Lin Xiaodong buying in front and him carrying the bags behind, just looking at the youth’s back made him feel content.

Occasionally, Gu Xingzhai would think of his mother. Because she had left too early, the woman’s face had long since become blurred in his memory; he only vaguely remembered that hand by the sickbed, cold and soft, and the moment it caressed his face felt like eternity.

But Master’s words from back then were like a thorn, deeply rooted in his life.

When he heard that Lin Xiaodong had gone to the town for a free clinic only to be splashed with a basin of black dog’s blood by ignorant townspeople on the street, Gu Xingzhai, for the first time in his life, felt the urge to kill innocent people—though he didn’t feel those people were innocent.

That night, he didn’t sleep at all.

Gu Xingzhai sat alone in the courtyard, looking at the desolate vegetation, seemingly thinking, but in reality, he was just in a daze. It wasn’t until Lin Xiaodong wrapped in a blanket came and sat beside him that he reacted.

“The weather is so cold, hurry back to your room to rest,” he frowned.

But the youth only leaned lazily against his shoulder, softly humming a tune. Gu Xingzhai listened intently for a while and found he was singing “Vainly Gazing at Knitted Brows” from Dream of the Red Chamber.

He thought Lin Xiaodong was heartbroken by the townspeople that day, so he comforted the youth not to take it to heart. But Lin Xiaodong suddenly asked him: the Crimson Pearl Grass came to repay the favor with tears, which is why she was reincarnated. If one person is entangled with another for several lifetimes, what exactly is it for?

This question stumped Gu Xingzhai for a moment.

Seeing him not answering, Lin Xiaodong smiled and sensibly changed the subject, starting to sing “SpongeBob SquarePants” to the moon.

…Though Gu Xingzhai didn’t know what on earth that was.

After leaving Qingxie Town, they headed north and encountered Xiao Liu on the way. To be honest, seeing Lin Xiaodong and Xiao Liu chatting in the carriage, with Xiao Liu often becoming flustered and blushing from just a few words, even knowing Lin Xiaodong couldn’t possibly have that kind of intention toward Xiao Liu, Gu Xingzhai still couldn’t help but feel a surge of jealousy. He wanted nothing more than to build a wall between the two on the spot to separate them.

When they finally reached the capital, that brat Xiao Liu caused trouble in the middle of the night again—fortunately, that arrow had already been shot; otherwise, Gu Xingzhai would have surely beaten him until his face blossomed. Though it wasn’t “warm fragrance and soft jade,” holding the warm body of the youth in his arms, no matter how difficult the world outside was, he always felt a sense of peaceful years and a place where his heart could rest.

The plan to let his junior brothers provide for him in his old age had been thrown into a corner the first day he met Xiao Liu. Gu Xingzhai could not tolerate those brats disturbing his and Lin Xiaodong’s world of two every day. If the thing with Xiao Liu happened a few more times, he couldn’t guarantee he would be able to control his temper and not kick them out of the sect.

Perhaps, after they traveled to all the mountains and rivers in the world, they could adopt one or two clever orphans. Anyway, in this era, there were plenty of children abandoned by their parents. Gu Xingzhai didn’t expect them to be very successful; as long as they could take good care of Lin Xiaodong after he passed away in a hundred years, it would be enough.

Demons generally have longer lifespans than humans, but so far, no demon has lived until they died of natural old age.

Some say this is a curse placed by the heavens on these evil creatures that plague the world, but Gu Xingzhai didn’t believe it.

Because Lin Xiaodong possessed the kindest and most upright heart he had ever seen in his life. Perhaps the youth didn’t admit it with his words, but his actions showed it without exception. It was also ironic that in this era, a demon had a benevolent heart to save all living beings, while humans harbored evil intentions and killed their own kind. Who knew who the true monsters were?

Therefore, Gu Xingzhai firmly believed that if the heavens truly had the virtue of loving life, they would surely let him live to a hundred.

He didn’t know why the court believed that eating a demon’s heart could lead to immortality. These people clearly did all sorts of evil and ruined their moral character, yet they still arrogantly thought about enjoying worldly wealth and glory for tens of thousands of years, even going as far as trying to defy fate, causing many innocent people to die in the dragon vein land. Master’s words echoed in his mind again. Gu Xingzhai forced himself to swallow his anger because he still had his junior brothers and Lin Xiaodong. He couldn’t act willfully; he had to endure.

But the result of endurance was that several of his junior brothers were captured and seriously injured. To save them, Lin Xiaodong used himself as a bargaining chip, ending up deep in prison, facing a pack of tigers, leopards, and wolves who wanted to cut out his heart and kidneys.

After forcibly “sending away” a group of junior brothers who were unwilling and wanted to return to the capital, Gu Xingzhai returned to the capital alone. For several days, he spent almost no time sleeping or eating as he investigated outside the Heavenly Prison, mapping out the guards’ shift changes, the positions of sentries, and various backup plans for an absolute emergency—he used the bottle of elixir Master had left him for life-saving as an exchange to ask a demon hunter to assist from the outside. No matter what, he had to get Xiaodong out safely.

But what made Gu Xingzhai feel suspicious was that he rescued the person with almost no effort.

He knew how much the old Emperor valued Lin Xiaodong. After all, starting from the First Emperor of Qin, every emperor had harbored a fanatical obsession with things like immortality. For this, they were even willing to pay any price and exhaust their military power. How could he have brought the person out single-handedly, without even suffering much injury?

“Why do you keep looking back?” the youth lying on his back said weakly. “Don’t worry, there are no pursuers behind us.”

Gu Xingzhai came back to his senses. He took the youth to the prepared resting place, helped him wipe his body with hot water, and cooked some rice porridge, feeding it to him spoonful by spoonful. But perhaps because his stomach was too weak, Lin Xiaodong threw it all up after only eating half. Seeing this, Gu Xingzhai wanted nothing more than to tear those dog officials into pieces.

“Since you can’t eat, then rest first.” He placed his hand on the youth’s forehead, which was soaked with sweat, and gently wiped the sweat off his face with a towel. “Have a good sleep. Don’t worry, I’m right by your side.”

But Lin Xiaodong, lying on the bed, just opened those beautiful phoenix eyes and gazed at him quietly, his expression seemingly hesitant.

“We are safe now,” Gu Xingzhai thought he was afraid, so he grabbed the youth’s hand and said patiently, “This is the outskirts of the capital. As long as we leave the city, the mountains are high and the Emperor is far away. Even those dog officials can’t do anything to us.”

“What about Xiao Liu and the others?”

“They are recovering from their injuries. When your health is a bit better in a couple of days, we’ll set off to join them.”

Lin Xiaodong grabbed the quilt and shook his head.

“Let’s go tomorrow,” he said hoarsely. “If they don’t see me, they probably won’t be able to recover in peace.”

“But…” Gu Xingzhai frowned tightly, truly worried about letting him set off like this. What if the fatigue of travel caused a permanent illness?

“Don’t worry,” Lin Xiaodong curled his lip. “I was just hung up like a salted fish for a few days, leading to muscle atrophy from lack of movement. It’ll be fine once I walk more.”

Under his repeated persuasion, Gu Xingzhai reluctantly agreed.

That demon hunter prepared a carriage for them, for free. Because he felt he hadn’t contributed much in this rescue, he was somewhat guilty. Lin Xiaodong had a private conversation with him. Gu Xingzhai felt a bit annoyed when he was kicked out of the room. When the man came out, Gu Xingzhai was prepared to probe him, but he saw the man looking at him with a very complex gaze, a look that gave him an ominous premonition.

“What did Xiaodong say to you?” he asked.

But the man only shook his head and refused to answer.

Before they left, he hesitated several times but still instructed: “If you come to the capital again in the future, please be sure to come find me first.”

Gu Xingzhai thought this was just a polite remark and agreed with a smile.

At that time, his heart only thought that he would probably never return to this place in his life. Even if he did, it would be when he was old and gray.

The wheels rolled, and the breeze brushed his face. Looking at the youth sleeping in the carriage, Gu Xingzhai only felt that the world was vast, and from now on, with the two of them together, nothing could ever separate them again. He had even planned that once they met his junior brothers, he would send those brats to prepare the gifts and red cloth for the wedding, pick an auspicious day to get married, and then set up a cenotaph for his Master to tell him the good news, so he could rest in peace in the underworld.

But he didn’t expect that in the end, more than one grave would have to be built.

From the second day they set out, Lin Xiaodong’s health began to deteriorate. From coughing up blood at the beginning to later vomiting large amounts of blood, the youth’s frail body became increasingly skeletal. Gu Xingzhai didn’t know why so much blood could come out of a person’s body. He frantically looked for doctors and even thought about returning to the capital to get the antidote for him, but Lin Xiaodong stopped him one by one.

“I am a doctor, have you forgotten?” The youth lay on the bed wrapped in a thick blanket, his voice as thin as a mosquito’s buzz. “This medicine took effect a bit faster than I imagined… but it’s good, there’s still time.”

Gu Xingzhai didn’t want to think about what “there’s still time” meant. He only wanted to know what method he could use to save him.

He even hated that he was not a demon and didn’t have a heart that could make one immortal. Otherwise, even if he had to cut out his own heart on the spot, Gu Xingzhai would be willing.

He tightly held Lin Xiaodong’s hand and pulled him into his arms. Outside were several junior brothers who had rushed from other places with their injuries after hearing the news. Their crying sounds made him feel incredibly distracted and annoyed. Lin Xiaodong coughed twice, his whole body trembling—the doctor said that when this poison took effect, it would cause unbearable pain throughout the body, but the youth never cried out in pain to him. He just couldn’t sleep night after night, curling up into a weak ball in his arms.

“In the next life,” he lay in his arms, and the last sentence he said to him was this, “remember to come find me earlier, otherwise…”

Lin Xiaodong couldn’t finish his sentence.

And at this time, Gu Xingzhai’s eyes were already bloodshot, his eyes nearly splitting with rage.

On the day of the burial, his junior brothers stood behind him, their crying shaking the heavens. Fourth Brother cried the loudest, even though he was the one who disliked Lin Xiaodong the most at the beginning. But Gu Xingzhai stood at the very front in black clothes, his eyes dry without a single tear.

Father, Master, Xiaodong… in just a short two years or so, the three most important people in his life had left him one after another.

Profound emotions do not last, and extreme brilliance leads to injury. Gu Xingzhai finally understood this phrase at this moment.

And in the end, he had nothing.

After finishing the graves for Xiaodong and Master, Gu Xingzhai went back to the room to pack the clothes left by the youth. Then he went to the nearest market on his own and bought a few yards of red cloth and two sets of men’s wedding robes. Under the hesitant gazes of his junior brothers, he decorated the house exactly like a wedding scene, then calculated an auspicious day himself, changed into the wedding robes, held the clothes, and walked into the main hall.

“First kowtow to Heaven and Earth—”

Heaven and Earth are heartless, but Gu Xingzhai was still grateful to the heavens for the honor of meeting the love of his life.

“Second kowtow to the High Parents—”

Both parents have passed away; Xingzhai is unfilial and could not always be by your side in this life. But please, elders, by the Bridge of Helplessness, help me look after Xiaodong.

“Kowtow to each other as husband and wife—”

Gu Xingzhai paused, his fingertips gently stroking the clothes left by the youth, which seemed to still carry the faint fragrance of lotus leaves.

In a daze, he returned to that courtyard in Qingxie Town. The lotus pond under the moonlight, the gentle breeze. He peeled crabs for the youth, watching those curved phoenix eyes, his heart full and content.

“Senior Brother,” Second Brother, who was presiding over the wedding, stood beside him, his voice trembling as he spoke, “the auspicious time has arrived, you should…”

He was covered in tears and could not continue.

Gu Xingzhai came back to his senses, gave a hum, and walked into the room under the watchful eyes of all his junior brothers.

The next morning, under the urging of the other brothers, Second Brother plucked up the courage to knock on the door: “Senior Brother, are you up?”

“Senior Brother?”

But when they burst open the door, they found the room was already empty. The room was empty, the bed was neatly made and hadn’t been slept in at all. The fruit plate on the table was also in its original state; only the red candle tears had flowed all over the floor.

Gu Xingzhai had left them a note that read:

“I have returned to the capital, do not seek or ask. Second Brother, the heavy responsibility of the sect is entrusted to you. I shall apologize to Master myself.”

The junior brothers were in an uproar on the spot, all wanting to go to the capital to advance and retreat with their Eldest Senior Brother, but Second Brother, with red eyes, stopped them all.

“No one is allowed to leave this courtyard!” he said sharply. “The eunuch surnamed Xie and Mu Kongxuan are both dead. Do you still not understand what Senior Brother went to the capital for?”

“A chaotic era is coming; at that time, war will break out everywhere, and the common people will suffer,” Second Brother took a deep breath and said to the grieving and indignant brothers, “I intend to join the army, but not the imperial soldiers, but the army of the common people—who among you is willing to go with me?”

“I!” “I’ll go too!” “Me too!”

Everyone present agreed in unison, but Second Brother spoke alone to Xiao Liu: “Master originally wanted to send you overseas to study. You are the most talented among us and should not be buried in the war. Senior Brother Gu also said that one against a hundred is but the courage of a common man. Only after you learn new ideas can you return to save the country and the people. Xiao Liu, are you willing to go?”

Xiao Liu was silent for a moment and nodded heavily.

“Good,” Second Brother finally showed a trace of a smile. He extended his hand and said to the brothers, “We have a pact. Even if we are separated in the future, we will set a ten-year term to reunite here—Senior Brother carved a path for us with his flesh and blood. I am willing to serve my country with this body; though tens of millions may stand against me, I shall go!”

“It’s a deal!”

————

Later records state that of the six disciples of the Capital Branch of the Profound Sect, except for the Eldest Senior Brother who went missing a year before the collapse of the dynasty, the other four all led troops to battle and became famous patriotic generals.

Three of them died on the battlefield, their bodies wrapped in horsehide. One became a Great General who left his name in history, witnessing the birth of a new era.

And one returned to the country after seven years of studying abroad, writing books and biographies, becoming a master-level figure of Enlightenment thought, praised by countless later generations. He lived to be a hundred and eight years old. Until he passed away, he insisted on coming to a villa on the outskirts of the capital every year to personally sweep the seven graves—however, when a student by his side was puzzled and asked why there were seven graves when there were only six masters and disciples of the Capital Branch of the Profound Sect besides him, he only shook his head and did not answer. Before he died, he required his descendants to bury him here, so that their sect could be reunited again after a hundred years.