Chapter 37#
Answer#
The night was deep, and the cold starlight spilled across the sky, blocked by dark clouds, distant yet thick.
The medical room in the dead of night was very quiet. Yin Beichen’s hurried footsteps echoed continuously down the corridor. Nodding to the person on duty, he took the elevator directly to the floor where Ou Jingshan was.
He was thinking about how to come up with an excuse for his abrupt visit, but before he even got close to the room, he heard a deafening… roar.
“Are you annoying? I told you, I just twisted my ankle going down the stairs because I wasn’t watching. What kind of imagination do you have?”
“Didn’t break a leg, didn’t lose a hand. I haven’t even smoked a few cigarettes lately! The signal in this medical room is bad, so I didn’t… Nest Star? Never heard of it. What kind of gossip news are you reading?”
“No, no mission. I’ve been at the base all this time!”
“…What do you mean, if I didn’t break a leg, I wouldn’t stay put? Is that any way to curse your own husband?!”
…
Yin Beichen walked to the door and saw Ou Jingshan lying on the bed. His face was a bit pale, his upper body propped up against two large pillows. One hand was pressing a light-brain communicator, while the other hand, outside the camera’s view, had an IV drip. He hadn’t noticed Yin Beichen’s arrival.
Thinking for a moment, Yin Beichen lightly tapped on the door.
“Commander?” Ou Jingshan was startled. He quickly said, “Talk later,” and hung up the communication. “Sorry, Commander. I didn’t notice you were here.”
He tried to salute, but Yin Beichen stopped him.
“It’s fine. I hope I’m not disturbing your rest.” Yin Beichen pulled a chair over and sat beside the bed. “Was that your wife?”
“Yes, my wife—she tends to overthink things and kept insisting on coming to visit me.” Ou Jingshan rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, a rare look of embarrassment on his face. “Don’t worry, Commander. I’ll make sure she doesn’t come!”
A slow smile curled at the corner of Yin Beichen’s mouth. “You have a good wife.”
They chatted about everyday matters for a while, mostly trivial household stuff.
Ou Jingshan was puzzled.
Not that Yin Beichen was cold-blooded, but after following the commander for so many years, he had never seen him sit down and chit-chat with subordinates like this. That kind of welfare work was usually only done by Ning Feng. Besides, who visits at this hour of the night? If his wife hadn’t called, he would have been long asleep.
And right now, he didn’t really want to see Yin Beichen. Every time he saw him, he remembered Ning Feng’s final moments.
Having served in the military for many years, he considered himself someone who had seen through life and death. But whenever he thought about how Ning Feng had sacrificed himself to save him, he felt an overwhelming sense of guilt. In the past, if the commander had come specifically to ask about his injuries, he would have been deeply touched. But now, he just wanted him to finish the small talk and leave.
They exchanged a few dry words before Yin Beichen finally broke the silence.
“You did an excellent job in this operation. I’ve already reported your deeds to the main star.” His tone was flat. “If you have any requests, feel free to make them.”
Ou Jingshan hesitated, unable to meet the commander’s eyes.
“Commander, I have no requests.” He kept rubbing the tip of his nose. “To be honest, I didn’t contribute much in this operation. On the contrary, Ning Feng…”
He asked urgently, “Have you found him?”
When he had first opened his eyes yesterday, he had grabbed someone immediately to ask about Ning Feng. Upon learning that the other’s cockpit still hadn’t been found, he felt a pang of panic and guilt. If only he had held on a bit longer, stayed behind to cover each other—would Ning Feng have been able to retreat safely?
Yin Beichen’s eyelids drooped halfway, his long lashes hiding his emotions but unable to hide his tightly pressed lips. “Not yet.”
The answer disappointed Ou Jingshan, and a surge of heat rose in his chest.
“Commander, there’s something I want to ask,” he said in a low voice.
“What is it?”
“Why didn’t you send anyone to reinforce Ning Feng?”
Just thinking about it made Ou Jingshan furious.
He had clearly urged them repeatedly to reinforce Ning Feng as soon as possible, but they had allowed the aircraft to drift into space! Didn’t they know that Ning Feng had already—already…
Faced with the accusation, a flicker of pain crossed Yin Beichen’s eyes, and he looked away.
“At the time, there were circumstances.”
“Then how could you send someone to reinforce me?”
“Ning Feng’s cockpit had a special escape device and a customized engine. Yours was just a standard research mech. At that time… I did miscalculate.” He closed his eyes, his voice evasive. “We’ve expanded the search range now, and there will be special countermeasures next. The cockpit will be found.”
Ou Jingshan’s face reddened with anger as he wanted to argue, but since this was his commander, he could only purse his lips and swallow his fury. He said gruffly, “What do you want from me?”
Yin Beichen’s gaze dimmed. With one hand, he tugged at the corner of his clothes, while the other slowly smoothed out the wrinkles.
“Actually, the reason I came is to ask you a question.”
“Go ahead.”
“When you killed the Lord, did you participate in it?”
Ou Jingshan felt utterly humiliated. “I was there at the time, but to be honest, I only provided some covering fire.”
He felt ashamed of this. If his combat mech hadn’t been destroyed, he wouldn’t have been reduced to piloting a research mech and playing a supporting role. The battle wouldn’t have been so difficult.
Yin Beichen nodded. “Was your voice channel clear?”
Hearing this, Ou Jingshan was stunned.
What kind of question was this?
He thought the commander wanted to ask about the detailed battle or information about the Nest Lord. Why suddenly bring up the voice channel?
But a commander’s question must be answered truthfully. He nodded. “It was clear the whole time, except for a period when it seemed to be turned off.”
Yin Beichen seemed to think of something, a faint… tenderness? appearing in his deep eyes.
The bald man thought he was seeing things, but soon the other asked again, “Was the voice channel maintained until the very end?”
The end…
Ou Jingshan suddenly remembered something, his mouth tightly shut. Only when the other asked again did he softly reply, “Mm.”
Suddenly, Yin Beichen’s eyes lit up. He leaned forward, his previously composed demeanor turning tense in an instant.
“Tell me, what were Ning Feng’s last words?”
“Last words?” Ou Jingshan opened his mouth.
“Yes, the last thing you heard.”
Even he could hear the urgency in Yin Beichen’s tone.
Stealing a glance at Yin Beichen, the usually boisterous man swallowed hard. His large hand rubbed the bedsheet, his expression growing increasingly dejected.
The last words.
Of course, he remembered what Ning Feng had said at the end.
And because he remembered, he felt that saying it directly to the commander’s face would be just too… cruel.
A searchlight outside the window swept past, stinging the corners of his eyes. He vacillated between confessing and continuing to hide the truth. Seeing Yin Beichen’s expression gradually turn cold, his gaze almost freezing someone on the spot, the bald man let out a long sigh, as if trying to expel the melancholy in his chest.
“He said, he loves you,” Ou Jingshan said quietly.
Remembering how he had even teased Ning Feng about this before, he felt almost drowned in guilt.
Yin Beichen’s eyelashes trembled slightly, a flash of pain in his eyes, and he softly hummed in acknowledgment. After waiting for a long time, he urged again.
“Anything else?”
Ou Jingshan was silent for a long while, until Yin Beichen’s expression grew increasingly impatient, before finally speaking.
“He doesn’t want to see you anymore.”
“…What?”
Ou Jingshan glanced at him. Seeing the usually aloof, superior look on Yin Beichen’s face for the first time tinged with bewilderment, as if he couldn’t understand the meaning of those words, he almost wanted to comfort him. But then he thought about how the commander hadn’t listened to him and sent someone to rescue Ning Feng, and felt it was unnecessary.
He took a deep breath and said loudly in a muffled voice.
“Ning Feng said! He never wants to see you again!”
Even though his ears refused to accept it, that forceful voice forced the words in. Yin Beichen stood frozen, staring blankly at the man. It took a long moment before he murmured softly, barely audible.
“Doesn’t want to see me?”
“Yes!” After a moment’s thought, Ou Jingshan added another blow.
“Not even in the next life!”
The searchlight outside swept in again, passing over his ghastly pale face. His heart ached with spasms, and Yin Beichen’s voice tightened as he muttered again, “He doesn’t want to see me… even in the next life?”
Ou Jingshan muttered to himself.
If it were him, he would probably want to kill the other person, let alone see him.
But the commander’s expression was truly unsettling, so he asked, “Are you alright?”
As if finally coming to his senses, Yin Beichen’s expression turned extremely grim. He didn’t answer, only slowly stood up. His usually straight and resolute posture now seemed a bit shaky.
Ou Jingshan got up to support him, but Yin Beichen gently pushed his hand away.
“Rest well.” Yin Beichen’s voice was hoarse. Then, step by painful step, he made his way toward the door.
Just as his hand touched the door, the man’s voice rang out again.
“Commander, you are an excellent commander. I have always had faith in your judgment on the battlefield,” Ou Jingshan said, his voice muffled. “But do you know that Ning Feng had already given me his only escape engine?”
Yin Beichen said nothing, standing motionless there.
This only made Ou Jingshan angrier, his voice involuntarily rising. “A cockpit—so small, without any defensive capability—drifting alone in space. I’m a rough man; I don’t know what kind of high-tech you have. But if you can’t even find the person, what use are all those fancy operations afterward?”
The more he spoke, the angrier he became. By the end, the veins on his forehead were faintly pulsing.
“So why didn’t you send support then!”
For an instant, the air in the room fell into a dead silence.
Yin Beichen stood stiffly for a while, then slowly opened the door and walked out.
Listening to the heavy footsteps fading away, Ou Jingshan irritably scratched his bald head. He stared blankly out the window for a while before picking up his light-brain and making a call.
“Babe, are you asleep?”
“What?! Packing your bags? What are you coming here for? I—”
“…Alright, alright. My fault, my fault. Don’t cry. You’ll wake up our daughter.”
“I’ll apply for leave in a few days and come home, okay? I’ll clear out your shopping cart when I get back—Hey, I’m really fine. Don’t cry.”
…
**
The pitch-black night was like oil-soaked paper, becoming translucent. The entire spaceport seemed draped in a cold, silvery gauze, broken only by the occasional low hum of engines and the hushed conversations of the on-duty personnel.
The silence of the air, the viscosity of the light—everything turned into lead and iron, piling heavy onto the heart.
Yin Beichen walked forward blankly. His footsteps echoed in the empty tarmac, shattering a few fragile hopes. A cold wind blew in gusts, but it couldn’t dispel the bitterness in his heart.
He recalled Ou Jingshan’s words, and his heart suddenly felt hollow, with nothing to anchor it.
Never see him again.
Ning Feng was probably aware of the chip matter. If he said he didn’t want to see him “even in the next life,” that meant he had completely abandoned the identity of “Ning Feng,” abandoned the body of “Ning Feng,” to start over as someone else… or perhaps to end it directly…
Suddenly, he thought again of the fleet commander’s words—
Disintegration.
They would have had a chance to meet again.
But now, the cockpit was missing. The search team had combed through almost all relevant locations, but there was no trace of Ning Feng’s body, not even a fragment of the cockpit wreckage—let alone the most crucial chip.
If only he had retrieved the cockpit sooner. If only he hadn’t said those words. If only…
But there are no “if onlys” in this world.
He had personally lost Ning Feng.
It was like seeing a tiny spark of hope, but because of his own negligence, he had watched it go out before his eyes. He could do nothing, nothing at all…
As if thrown into an endless, icy deep sea, the blood in Yin Beichen’s veins froze. His heart felt as if someone had stabbed it and twisted it fiercely—a tearing, excruciating pain shot from the top of his head down to his heels.
But he couldn’t pull the knife out.
If the cockpit had truly disintegrated, where would Ning Feng be?
Where was he supposed to look?
Yin Beichen kept thinking. Occasionally, someone saluted him, but he couldn’t hear what they said. He silently walked toward the tarmac, toward the bay where private transport aircraft were docked.
The person on duty was still yawning when he suddenly saw a vague figure approaching, startling him. Squinting, he realized it was the supreme commander, immediately snapped to attention and saluted, but Yin Beichen didn’t react.
Puzzled, he mustered the courage to ask again, “Commander, are you going out?”
This time, Yin Beichen finally responded.
He stopped, tilted his head slightly. There was no light in his eyes, and his face was unnaturally pale.
The duty officer swallowed. Then he heard the commander ask a very strange question.
“Where is the nearest mass grave to Ruin City?”
“Mass grave?” The duty officer was dumbfounded.
Mass graves were typically located on uninhabited junk planets. Buried there were mostly unclaimed corpses found in high orbit, or interstellar pirates and homeless refugees. Even the poorest of the poor wouldn’t want to bury their loved ones there.
What would General Yin want with a mass grave in the middle of the night?
Still, the duty officer sent a few coordinates to the commander. The other nodded slightly, then turned and slowly walked away.
Yin Beichen boarded the aircraft without a pilot. He set the destination to the nearest mass grave and, amidst the roar of the engines, skillfully navigated out of the spaceport.
The vast universe was empty, only the aircraft speeding under the stars. Vague bands of light receded backward, and the light and shadow refracted on his skin were cut into diamond shapes, making his expression look grim and somber.
Near the coordinates where he had gone missing, there was a mass grave. If the aircraft had disintegrated due to an accident, a craft that large would have left some debris scattered in the atmosphere, possibly recovered.
As long as he could find the wreckage of the aircraft, there was hope of finding Ning Feng.
With that thought, Yin Beichen pushed the aircraft’s speed to maximum.
**
After several space jumps, the aircraft soon landed outside the nearest mass grave. The undulating hills were deep and shallow, the broken buildings blurred into darkness, their edges softened, looking from a distance like a bloodied, mangled face.
The keeper of the place was an old man with graying hair, annoyed at being woken in the middle of the night. Yin Beichen said nothing, simply asked the man to lead the way into the dilapidated cemetery.
Unattended, the place was overgrown with weeds, dead leaves scattered everywhere, desolate. Hundreds of graves lay here. The trembling night wind carried the scent of death, settling into everyone’s eyes.
“It’s over here—graves buried within the last month or so.”
Entering the cemetery in the middle of the night was terrifying enough, and having a handsome, expressionless man beside him only made it worse. The old man’s heart shuddered. After leading him to the spot, he slipped away with his flashlight.
Looking left and right, Yin Beichen walked step by step to the nearest grave, then slowly knelt down, as if drained of all strength.
Mud stained his pant legs, a creeping chill seeping through the fabric. Despair was like an inescapable net, trapping him tightly. Yet his mind was oddly calm.
Counting it out, it had been almost twenty days. Even if there were life-support systems in the cockpit, by the time it was dug up, it would probably have started to decay, wouldn’t it?
Yin Beichen thought blankly, his long fingers digging deep into the soil.