Chapter 49#
Coward.#
A week later, the competition was held as scheduled.
The competition format was divided into preliminaries, semi-finals, and finals. After successful online registration, the online preliminaries began. Scores were given according to groups, and the top 40% of contestants in each group advanced to the semi-finals.
On the stage, a single spotlight focused on a piano. In the first row below the stage sat five judges, with their names and titles displayed on the tables before them—all highly professional individuals.
Sitting right in the center was the organizer and judge of this art competition: Athos Hall.
He wore a brown suit, his light brown, medium-length hair draped behind his head, and thin silver glasses shielded his gray-blue eyes. Athos Hall was very tall; even sitting down, he was a head taller than those beside him. His brow was slightly furrowed, his expression focused as he looked down at the contestant registration forms in his hand.
After a morning of screening, Hall felt a tightness between his brows. He took off his glasses and rubbed the slightly aching corners of his eyes.
Next contestant.
Jian Yunchen.
The stage lights gradually dimmed, leaving only a single beam of light quietly illuminating Jian Yunchen.
Tiny dust motes floated silently in the light, gathering around him like bright points of light. Jian Yunchen stood tall and straight, wearing a white silk shirt. The thin fabric of the collar revealed the snowy skin beneath; two buttons were undone, draped casually over his collarbone. The hem was tucked into black trousers, and his slender waist stood out in stark contrast against the deep blue backdrop of the curtain behind him.
He first bowed toward the audience, then tilted his head, resting the violin against his shoulder, his jawline tracing a sharp and cold silhouette.
The performance slowly began. Jian Yunchen played Violin Sonata No. 5 in F Major, “Spring.” The soothing violin melody was like crushed spring light, harmonious and gentle. The tune was vigorous and bright; the leaping staccato notes were like the fluttering wings of butterflies in spring, bursting with agile and vivid vitality.
It was as if he had transported the audience into a field bathed in sunlight, filled with the joy and hope of springtime.
When the performance ended, Jian Yunchen released the tension in his back muscles. He slowly exhaled, lowered the violin in his hand, and turned to face the judges.
He didn’t pay attention to the evaluations of the other teachers. When he looked up, his eyes met those of Athos Hall, who was sitting in the center.
The gray-blue eyes gazed at him quietly through the lenses.
Jian Yunchen’s heart skipped a beat under that calm gaze.
Once the scoring was complete, Jian Yunchen temporarily went backstage.
At the backstage entrance, Jiang Yunhan was waiting for him.
“Xiao Chen!” Jiang Yunhan’s eyes were bright, his tone joyful. “You were amazing!”
Jian Yunchen’s footsteps paused slightly, the expression on his face turning several degrees colder as he bypassed him and continued walking inside.
Jiang Yunhan followed behind him, failing to see the face that had instantly gone cold, and continued to ask, “Xiao Chen, when did you learn that? The violin is so difficult. I didn’t expect you to play so well. Congratulations on making it to the finals!”
“Shut up!”
Jian Yunchen stopped abruptly, turned his head, and looked at him coldly with dark eyes.
Jiang Yunhan was stunned by the rebuke and stood frozen, not daring to move forward.
Jian Yunchen ignored the pale-faced Jiang Yunhan, left him behind, and kept walking.
He walked forward with his head down, bumping into several people in succession without even realizing it. His lips were pressed tightly together, and Hall’s words kept circling repeatedly in his mind.
He gritted his teeth. The emotions in his chest had nowhere to go, suppressed heavily in his heart, making even his heartbeat slow down.
Carrying his violin, Jian Yunchen ducked into a dressing room and locked the door behind him. The stifling fire in his chest burned more and more fiercely. He resentfully threw the violin toward its case, crossed his wrists, and suddenly grabbed the hem of his shirt to pull it up. The clear, smooth lines of his back muscles undulated slightly with his movements. Just as the hem was pulled up to his shoulder blades, a pair of hands suddenly reached out from behind, locking him firmly in a hug.
He struggled twice, but the strength of the hold only grew. Angered, he slammed his elbow unceremoniously into the person’s stomach.
However, his elbow was deftly caught by a hand, which took the opportunity to pull him completely into an embrace.
Jian Yunchen was furious. The sound of their gradually heavy breathing echoed in the dressing room. He was forced to arch his back and turn sideways to dodge, but he was held so tightly that he had no room to turn.
“Qin Mu! Have you had enough?” he rebuked in a suppressed voice.
Qin Mu let out a soft chuckle near his ear. The hand holding his elbow loosened and slid down to tighten around Jian Yunchen’s wrist. The hand holding the shirt hem let go, and the fabric slid down, covering the pattern on his lower back.
“Where are you planning to run?” Qin Mu lowered his eyes slightly, his breath brushing against the tip of Jian Yunchen’s ear. “Didn’t you say you were going to win for me to see?”
Jian Yunchen’s chest heaved violently a few times in anger. He turned to look at Qin Mu. The other man’s usual playful expression caused all the accumulated indignation, anger, and shame to surge up at once.
“I can’t win!”
As the words fell, the corners of Jian Yunchen’s eyes instantly turned red.
His venting emotions seemed to have found an outlet. He stared at Qin Mu without blinking. Recalling the critiques, he gave a cold, self-mocking smile and spoke: “Hall said I can’t win.”
After the performance, Hall had stated frankly: “You have technique, but that is all.”
“I can feel your desire to win, but I don’t feel a desire to play for the audience.”
“Music is not a solo show. Your service is for the audience. You simply want to present this piece in an absolutely perfect state, but you have precisely lost the most essential soul of this piece.”
“Vitality.”
“What are you playing for?”
After Hall finished speaking, he gave his score. The lowest and highest scores were discarded, and the final score was the average of the remaining ones.
Hall’s score was among those that had been discarded.
Intense unwillingness and extreme humiliation instantly enveloped him. What made him feel even more powerless was that he had no way to refute a single word Hall had said.
So he could only take his anger out on himself and go hide.
With red eyes, he admitted defeat to Qin Mu: “I can’t win.”
He repeated it softly.
He had long anticipated this result; he just wasn’t quite willing to accept it.
That was why he thought of coming to try.
He had tried, but the unwillingness in his heart hadn’t lessened by a single point. Instead, it was like a bottomless pit, staring at him every moment.
Smack!
A crisp sound interrupted Jian Yunchen’s thoughts. Pain began to radiate from his backside. Jian Yunchen’s whole body stiffened, and his face instantly flushed red. He suddenly erupted with even greater strength and began to struggle.
Qin Mu raised his hand again and landed another palm strike on Jian Yunchen’s buttocks.
Jian Yunchen bit his lip and let out an involuntary muffled groan. “Qin Mu!” he shouted his name, his patience at an end.
Qin Mu gave a light sneer: “Coward.”
Those two words accurately pierced Jian Yunchen’s sensitive self-esteem. His eyes widened, and even though his body was restrained, he tried his best to twist around and look at him: “Who are you calling—”
Qin Mu lowered his eyes to meet his. Suddenly, he let go of him. He flicked his finger against Jian Yunchen’s forehead, leaving a red mark. Jian Yunchen clutched his head and looked at him in confusion.
“Losing isn’t scary. Being afraid before the competition has even begun is.”
“If you’re not a coward, then what are you?”
“Winning and losing are never defined by others. If even you think you’ve lost, then you have truly lost.”
Qin Mu’s voice sounded close to his ear:
“Don’t help others bully yourself.”