Chapter 39 - 2#

Xiao Cuan’s eyes narrowed, staring fixedly at him.

“I’m a good friend of Yan Zhi’s, and I’ve brought some brown sugar cakes. They’re cheap and filling.”

“It’s none of your business,” Xiao Cuan spoke coldly. “Get lost.”

“I’ll just go in and give him a piece of brown sugar cake. I won’t say anything to him…”

Chu Yu still wanted to try more, but Xiao Cuan waved his hand, and the two guards immediately grabbed Chu Yu’s arms and carried him out.

“Your Majesty… Your Majesty… don’t you remember me? We’ve met before, right at…”

“Shut up!”

Xiao Cuan suddenly exploded in anger, shouting.

The two guards threw Chu Yu out the gate and slammed it shut with a “bang.”

Finally, Xiao Cuan said: “If you dare come here again, I’ll slice you to death with one blow!”

Chu Yu had just patted the gate when he heard Xiao Cuan say this and could only turn away.

He had tried every possible way but still couldn’t see Yan Zhi. Now…

He could only leave Yan Zhi to his own fate.

Meanwhile, Yan Zhi sat on the couch in the bedroom, frowning with real confusion.

What did Chu Yu mean by those words?

What was “a cream puff is too expensive”?

Where did His Majesty get the cream puffs? Were they bought?

Chu Yu knew about cream puffs, yet he hadn’t mentioned where they could be bought before.

Also, what was “we’ve met before”?

Had His Majesty and Chu Yu met before?

He had been with His Majesty for ten years; if they had met, he would have known.

Why was Chu Yu talking so strangely?

What kind of riddles were they speaking in? What secret did they have between them?

Before Yan Zhi could figure this out, another guard came over to report.

“Your Majesty—”

Yan Zhi pulled himself together again and looked out.

“The horses and boats are ready; we can set off anytime.”

“This is a doctor from Huichun Hall in the city; he’s ready to see Young Master Yan Zhi anytime.”

“The news has been sent to the capital. I believe Master Bian will receive it in a few days and start preparing.”

Xiao Cuan nodded slightly: “Mm.”

The guard gave a final salute and retreated.

Still draped in Yan Zhi’s garment, Xiao Cuan turned back into the room.

Startled, Yan Zhi hesitated for a moment and instinctively retreated into the corner, closing his eyes.

He… he didn’t want to face His Majesty.

He didn’t know how to face him.

He was afraid His Majesty would scold him again, bully him again, force him to eat cream puffs again.

He didn’t want to, he…

Yan Zhi kept his eyes tightly closed.

He couldn’t see anything; he could only hear Xiao Cuan’s footsteps.

From far to near, from the door to the couch.

Finally, the footsteps stopped in front of him.

Xiao Cuan seemed to look at him for a while, then reached out and pinched his cheek.

“When you wake up, eat some breakfast and let the doctor check your pulse. If everything is fine, we’ll go back.”

Having said this, Xiao Cuan sat on the couch.

He seemed to know Yan Zhi was already awake, or perhaps he was talking to himself.

“That Empress’s wedding dress you saw was actually yours. I didn’t let you wear it, and you really didn’t wear it.”

—Clearly, His Majesty himself had been so stern, not allowing him to try it on.

Yan Zhi lowered his head and answered softly in his heart.

“Did you think I was going to make someone else Empress, so you ran away?”

—Not at all. No matter who His Majesty made Empress, he would have run away.

“I made it so obvious back then, writing a decree for you, making clothes for you, even letting you guard the clothes. You didn’t see it at all?”

—Clearly, His Majesty himself had said that his family background and appearance were the lowest of the low, and he wasn’t worthy.

Xiao Cuan looked at Yan Zhi hidden in the corner, his cheek moving slightly like a small squirrel’s, as if confirming something.

He let out a long breath, finally making up his mind to confess.

—“I’ve already sent word to Bian Ying to prepare the coronation ceremony. You’ll be Empress when you return.”

—“I don’t want to.”

Xiao Cuan was rarely frank, so Yan Zhi no longer pretended to be asleep and looked up to speak seriously to him.

But Xiao Cuan acted as if he hadn’t heard and continued—

“This coronation will be exactly as you like. Whether you want red or white silk hung in the palace, it’s all up to you.”

“On the way back, you should also read more books. I’ll have them buy some for you, and I’ll personally teach you to improve your scholarship as soon as possible.”

“Your body is indeed too weak. Have the doctor follow us the whole way, give you some tonics to eat, and I’ll take you to practice horse stances to improve your martial arts too.”

Yan Zhi pursed his lips and spoke again: “I don’t want to.”

Still not hearing him, Xiao Cuan went on: “As for your family background—”

“Between Liu Xun and Bian Ying, you choose one to be your adoptive father. I’ll have them adopt you as their son, and your background issue will be resolved.”

“I think you’ll probably choose Bian Ying. Don’t you like Bian Mingyu and want to be friends with him? This is perfect; you two can be brothers.”

“I’ve taken the time to ask Bian Mingyu; he truly likes women. With you as his brother, I’ll be at ease.”

Finally, Xiao Cuan asked: “Is there anything else I haven’t considered? Say it, and I’ll take care of it.”

Yan Zhi said seriously: “I don’t want to!”

“Don’t want what?”

Xiao Cuan seemed to pretend not to understand, or perhaps he truly didn’t.

“Don’t want to be Bian Ying’s adoptive son? Then let it be Liu Xun. Both are high-ranking officials in the court, their ranks are the same, and their character is trustworthy.”

“You’ll move into their mansion the night before the ceremony… forget it, don’t even go to their mansion. Just stay in the palace, get on the carriage, take a round trip from the palace to their mansion and back, and just go through the motions.”

Yan Zhi stated again: “I don’t want to be Empress.”

Xiao Cuan reminded him: “What I’m making you is the Empress, not a concubine, much less a servant.”

“I know…”

“I also—” Xiao Cuan paused, making another concession, “will not appoint any more concubines.”

Anyway, he didn’t like men, nor did he like women.

Back then, the selection was only to complete a task.

Now that he had long given up the task, the selection didn’t matter.

Keeping more people in the palace just meant more rice being eaten.

Yan Zhi alone was enough.

Xiao Cuan assumed the problem was solved and asked: “Anything else?”

Yan Zhi lowered his head, not knowing what to say.

If it had been a few months ago, while they were still in the Daliang Palace, and His Majesty said he wanted to make him Empress, he would surely have been so happy he’d fly; he would surely have hugged His Majesty and thanked him loudly.

But now, what was the use of saying these things now?

He had already flown out of the Daliang Palace and tasted freedom. How could he go back?

How could he go back to be Empress?

Even if His Majesty let him go back to be the Emperor or the Retired Emperor, he wouldn’t go!

But why, after saying “I don’t want to” several times, did His Majesty act as if he hadn’t heard?

Why?

Did he truly not hear, or was he intentionally not listening?

Intentionally ignoring him? Was his own will not important at all?

Was it always that His Majesty did whatever he wanted between them?

His Majesty scolded him whenever he wanted, and bit him whenever he wanted.

His Majesty threw him away whenever he wanted, and now that His Majesty wanted to pick him up, he had to go back.

Yan Zhi hugged his legs, his chest rising and falling from the frustration in his heart, ready to burst.

Seeing that he seemed angry, Xiao Cuan thought for a moment and asked: “You don’t want to be Master Bian’s adoptive son?”

Yan Zhi lowered his head further, clenching his hands: “I don’t want to.”

Xiao Cuan continued to guess: “Is it for your mother? You think it wouldn’t be good for her?”

“I don’t want to.”

“Then—” Xiao Cuan paused, rarely patient, and made another concession, “I’ll title your mother ‘Lady of Chong State,’ also of the first rank, so your family status will be high.”

Yan Zhi still said the same thing.

“I’ve considered it for months; what else are you dissatisfied with?”

Yan Zhi’s fists clenched tighter, his short, round nails digging into his palms, the dull pain keeping him clear-headed.

Seeing him silent, Xiao Cuan said: “Then let’s do it that way. I’ll have them prepare. You eat something first, and after that, I’ll take you to the docks to catch a boat back to the capital.”

As he spoke, he was about to stand up and call for someone.

“Come—”

“I don’t want to!”

Yan Zhi propped himself on the window sill and also stood up from the couch.

Since His Majesty couldn’t hear clearly, he would shout it out!

“I don’t want to! I don’t want to! I don’t want to!”

Xiao Cuan turned back suddenly, the gentle expression he had intentionally put on instantly vanishing.

In its place was the usual fierce, predatory cruelty.

“What did you say? What don’t you want?”

“I don’t want to be Master Bian’s adoptive son! I don’t want to study! I don’t want to learn martial arts!”

“If you don’t want to, then don’t.” Xiao Cuan ground his teeth, clearly enraged, yet still trying to suppress the fire in his heart. “I wasn’t expecting you to improve much anyway. What else ‘don’t you want’? Say it all at once.”

But in the next moment, Yan Zhi shouted loudly—

“I don’t want to be Empress either!”

“Dare you say that again!” Xiao Cuan barked. “Take it back!”

Standing on the couch, the anger suppressed all night and the sadness of months finally erupted all at once.

“I said, I don’t want to be Empress either!”

“I don’t want to be Empress! I don’t want to be Your Majesty’s Empress! I don’t want to marry Your Majesty! I don’t want to live with Your Majesty!”

Xiao Cuan instinctively barked: “Idiot, do you know what you’re saying?”

Yan Zhi followed his words and continued: “I don’t want to be called ‘idiot’ by Your Majesty anymore! I don’t want to be treated like a ‘puppy’ by Your Majesty anymore! I don’t want to be bullied by Your Majesty anymore!”

Xiao Cuan’s face was ashen as he tried to stop him again: “Yan Zhi! Shut up!”

“I don’t like Your Majesty anymore! When I was in the purification chamber, I already swore that I would never, ever, ever like Your Majesty again!”

“If I ever like Your Majesty again, let me be struck by lightning and thunder!”

Yan Zhi raised his right hand, three fingers extended, held high, his gaze resolute.

In a daze, Yan Zhi felt as if he were back on the day he fell ill just after moving to Tianshui Alley.

He lay in bed with a high fever, muddled, hidden in his quilt, cursing His Majesty.

Ill as he was, he had that courage, and naturally, he would have it when sober!

Yan Zhi stood on the couch, looking down at Xiao Cuan.

As he shouted, his eyes turned red involuntarily, and two lines of tears rolled down.

Finally, he no longer cared about Xiao Cuan’s face, dark as ink, nor the reopened wound on Xiao Cuan’s shoulder, and loudly pronounced a death sentence for Xiao Cuan—

“I hate Your Majesty! I hate you!”

“Xiao Cuan, I hate you to death!”

“Hate. You. To. Death!”