Chapter 2#
Fighting for Favor: Come here, I’ll teach you.#
Great Liang Palace, side hall of Taiji Palace.
Yanzhi sat at a small table, holding his face in both hands, staring blankly at the crushed cream puff.
Qing State had surrendered, the great army returned, and His Majesty was discussing affairs with the ministers in the main hall.
Because his clothes had been dirtied by the puff, he had apologized to the Emperor and returned to his room to change.
But now that he was changed, he didn’t want to go to the main hall.
Anyway, there were sixty-four eunuchs and sixty-four maids in the Emperor’s sleeping quarters. Even if they took turns serving, it would be a long, long time before it was his turn.
The palace servants would naturally serve tea and snacks to the Emperor; nothing would go wrong.
Yanzhi tilted his head, extended his right index finger, dipped it in some cream, and put it in his mouth.
Hmm…
Yanzhi couldn’t help but wrinkle his small face.
The originally sweet and soft cream had suddenly become very, very bitter.
Perhaps it was because the weather was too hot, or perhaps the puff had spoiled while hidden in his bosom.
Or perhaps because…
His Majesty was going to hold a beauty selection.
Whenever he thought about this, Yanzhi felt bitterness in his heart.
He went limp all over, slumped listlessly on the table like a little goldfish out of water.
His Majesty was about to hold a selection.
The palace would soon have an Empress, noble concubines, and various young masters.
What would he be then?
His Majesty didn’t seem to have any intention of giving him a title, and had even specially reminded him not to think about stuffing himself into the harem.
He didn’t want to help His Majesty with the selection, nor did he want to see those noble, beautiful, and clever young masters of high families.
He didn’t want to.
Right now, he only wanted to hide in bed, cover his head with the quilt, and have a good cry.
Crying it is!
Yanzhi stood up, and just as he was about to jump onto the bed, there was a knock at the door.
“Master Yanzhi, His Majesty summons you to the main hall.”
“Oh… okay.” Yanzhi immediately wiped his tears and returned to his usual appearance. “I’m coming.”
Before leaving, he picked up the broken cream puff, stuffed it into his mouth, and ate it in one go.
Even though this puff was bitter, it was because he hadn’t kept it well that it spoiled.
Besides, this was something the Emperor gave him; he didn’t want to waste it.
Yanzhi puffed out his cheeks, chewed, and swallowed the puff.
Ah…
Still so bitter!
The palace servant who came to call him was still waiting outside to lead him.
Yanzhi didn’t dare to delay. He wiped his hands and mouth with a handkerchief and pushed the door open.
“Let’s go.”
The servant led Yanzhi. The two walked hurriedly through the corridors and arrived at the main hall.
When they arrived, the main hall’s doors were wide open.
A dozen or so high-ranking officials were kneeling in two rows according to their civil and military rank.
On the high throne, Xiao Cuan had one leg propped up, leaning casually against a bolster.
The imperial desk in front of him was piled with memorials, and he held one in his hand.
The memorial was long, its folded scrolls hanging down and resting on his leg.
While reading casually, Xiao Cuan said: “Liu Xun, I remember you have a son?”
The official named Liu Xun hurriedly stood up to reply: “Replying to Your Majesty, my son is already married.”
“What about your grandson?”
“My grandson has just turned three.”
“I see.” Xiao Cuan paused, then casually called another name: “Bian Ying?”
“My son is dull-witted and unruly. If he can catch Your Majesty’s eye, it would naturally be for the best.”
“Bring him to the victory banquet tonight to see me.”
“I obey the decree.”
Yanzhi waited obediently outside the door, hearing His Majesty call the names of several more high officials, asking about the children in their families.
The officials answered one by one, yet a faint worry was hidden in their tone and expression.
It made sense.
Whether they were well-cultivated sons and daughters or unruly little monkeys, they were all the treasures of their families.
As parents, they naturally weren’t willing to let them enter the palace.
Must be nice.
Yanzhi thought that when he was sold into the palace, his biological father and stepmother took the money and ran, without even looking back at him once.
Before long, Xiao Cuan had finished questioning all the officials present—how many people were in their families, how many trees were in their yards, and how many chickens were in their coops; he asked everything clearly.
Xiao Cuan put down the memorial and waved them away: “Go now. For the banquet tonight, make sure to bring the eligible children from your families.”
“Yes.” The officials bowed. “We take our leave.”
Xiao Cuan raised his eyes, caught a glimpse of Yanzhi standing outside, and beckoned him: “Little dog, come here.”
“Yes…”
Yanzhi pursed his lips and lowered his head, not daring to look at the ministers’ faces.
He was afraid they would think he was…
Of lowly status, lacking in manners, frivolous, and disrespectful.
His Majesty called him a “little dog,” and he actually answered.
Actually, he didn’t want to be a “little dog” either, but His Majesty insisted on calling him that, and he had no choice.
Xiao Cuan sat on the high platform, switching legs.
He lowered his gaze, looking playfully at Yanzhi’s bowed head and red face. The timid appearance was interesting.
An obedient and submissive little dog like this—you couldn’t find a second one in this world or any other.
He pondered for a moment, then hooked his finger at Yanzhi again.
“Tsk, tsk, tsk—”
Before the words faded, Yanzhi looked up in disbelief.
Immediately after, he was tripped by the threshold he hadn’t crossed yet.
“Ah…”
With a “thud,” Yanzhi fell flat on the floor. He instinctively looked back at the ministers.
No, he didn’t want to fall! He wasn’t someone who didn’t know etiquette!
The ministers didn’t dare to look at him, simply lowering their heads and silently quickening their pace to leave.
“Idiot.”
Seeing him fall, Xiao Cuan’s expression immediately turned cold. He cursed, strode forward, grabbed Yanzhi’s collar, and lifted him from the floor.
“What are you thinking about all day? Falling even while walking perfectly fine?”
Yanzhi clutched his head and tried to explain: “It’s because Your Majesty…”
“You dare blame me?” Xiao Cuan was incredulous. “I was sitting several fathoms away from you, and you blame me?”
“No, it’s because Your Majesty called me ’little dog’ and even went ’tsk, tsk, tsk’ at me. I was startled for a moment, and that’s why…”
“What’s there to be startled about?” Xiao Cuan countered. “Commoners in every household call their own little dogs like that. Why can’t I?”
“But…”
But they are calling real little dogs, and he wasn’t.
Just then, the ministers exited the main hall, and the guards standing outside closed the doors.
With a soft sound, Yanzhi’s words were cut off.
Only the two of them remained in the hall.
Xiao Cuan carried Yanzhi with one hand, lifted him onto the jade platform, and dropped him by the desk.
“Grind the ink. I need to review two memorials.”
“Yes…”
“Tsk, tsk, tsk—”
His Majesty was doing it on purpose.
Yanzhi opened his mouth, but fearing he would anger the Emperor, he didn’t protest in the end.
He sat down properly, took the cinnabar inkstick, dripped two drops of water into the inkstone, and began to grind ink peacefully.
He intended to yield, but His Majesty refused to let him off, saying: “Weren’t you being all righteous just now? Why have you suddenly become a mute?”
“I haven’t.” Yanzhi didn’t know what to say, so he could only make a small sound to show he hadn’t become a little mute.
“That’s not how a little dog sounds.” Xiao Cuan lifted his brush and dipped it in ink. “Try another.”
Yanzhi finally couldn’t help but whisper: “I’m not a little dog.”
“If you’re not a little dog, then what are you?”
Xiao Cuan countered: “I ask you—”
“Who gives you the food and drink you consume daily?”
“Who gives you the clothes and items you use?”
“Who do you follow around day and night?”
Without waiting for Yanzhi to answer, Xiao Cuan answered for him.
“The food and drink, I give them.”
“The clothes and items, I give them too.”
“During the day, you trot along behind me, and at night, you crawl onto my couch to serve.”
“Isn’t that exactly like a real little dog?”
“Oh, I wouldn’t sleep with a real little dog, but I sleep with you. When we sleep, you’re not behind me, but in front of me.”
Yanzhi’s cheeks were flushed, his eyes wide, staring blankly at Xiao Cuan.
What His Majesty said… seemed to make a lot of sense.
He simply couldn’t refute it.
But in his heart, a small voice kept saying to him—
I’m not a little dog, I’m not a little dog, I’m not a little dog…
While Xiao Cuan was writing flamboyantly on the memorials, he reached out, pinched Yanzhi’s cheek, and gave it a hard shake.
“Dazing off again? I’m out of ink.”
Yanzhi snapped out of it, hurriedly picked up the inkstick, and continued grinding.
Xiao Cuan asked: “You were standing outside just now, did you hear everything?”
Yanzhi was confused: “Your Majesty means…”
“At the banquet tonight, those ministers will bring their children. Don’t just focus on eating; look more at these children from noble families and learn from them.”
“Yes,” Yanzhi replied gloomily.
Xiao Cuan asked again: “It took you forever to change your clothes. Were you hiding in your room crying secretly?”
“I wasn’t.”
He hadn’t had time to cry yet.
“Your eyes are as red as a rabbit’s, yet you say you wasn’t. A little dog’s mouth is indeed quite stubborn.”
Xiao Cuan gave a light snort. The hand pinching Yanzhi’s cheek moved back, pulling him in front of himself.
“Instead of having time to hide in your room and cry, or time to argue with me about whether you’re a little dog, why don’t you pull yourself together and think about how to handle the selection well to satisfy me?”
“I will do my best to manage it,” Yanzhi lowered his eyes and replied gloomily.
“After you’ve thought about how to handle the selection, why don’t you think about how you’re going to fight for favor?”
“Fighting for favor…” Yanzhi looked up, somewhat confused.
Seeing that he had a reaction, Xiao Cuan continued with this line of thought, teasing him further.
“Yes, fighting for favor.”
“Your life is too comfortable now. I only have you by my side, and I summon you every day.”
“Once the newcomers enter the palace, thousands and tens of thousands of them, a massive crowd. Even if I see one every day, it would take several years to get to you.”
“When that time comes, you’ll hide in your room, day and night clutching your pillow, crying ‘woof woof’ until the palace is flooded. And that’s a better scenario.”
“If things are worse, you’ll be caught by the Empress or the noble concubines I’ve appointed. Seeing your silly appearance—unable to do this or that—they’ll find you an eyesore and forbid you from eating or drinking, making you kneel in the palace corridors. What will you do then?”
Xiao Cuan described it so vividly, it was as if it were real.
Yanzhi was frightened by the scene he painted, his face turning several shades paler: “I’ll ask Your Majesty to decide for me…”
“Ask me? At that time, I might not remember who you are, let alone go through the trouble of deciding for you. With your small frame, you’d starve to death in two days. What then?”
“Then I’ll run away.”
“Run? The palace is heavily guarded, with patrolling guards everywhere. Where could you run?”
“Then I’ll just die.” Yanzhi had no other way. “The stories say, if the monarch wants the subject to die, the subject must…”
“Are you a ‘subject’? You’re a little dog.”
Not getting the answer he wanted, Xiao Cuan suddenly became annoyed.
“If I won’t remember you then, why don’t you take advantage of the fact that the newcomers haven’t arrived yet and use all your skills to favor me, so that I’ll remember you? How can you not understand such a simple truth?”
“Ah?”
Yanzhi still looked bewildered.
He didn’t know how to fight for favor; he didn’t know how.
“If you die one day, it will be from stupidity. If I die one day, it will be because you’re too stupid.”
Xiao Cuan’s hand tightened on Yanzhi’s cheek, pulling him over.
“Come here! I’ll teach you!”
Yanzhi was pulled over and sat on Xiao Cuan’s lap.
In front was the Emperor’s tall and sturdy chest, and behind him was the imperial desk piled with memorials.
With a wolf in front and a tiger behind, he had no way to escape.
Yanzhi blinked his eyes, seemingly understanding something, and reached out to unfasten the hidden buckles on the Emperor’s armor.
So this was what His Majesty meant.
Seeing that he had finally understood, Xiao Cuan’s expression softened.
He held his brush and continued to review the memorials: “I’ll give you fifteen minutes. Before I finish these urgent memorials, use all your skills to please me.”
“Yes.” Yanzhi pursed his lips. “Actually, Your Majesty could have just said so directly.”
“Now you are the one seducing me, not me begging you,” Xiao Cuan corrected him. “I’m teaching you. Whether you do it or not is indifferent to me.”
“Oh…”
With a soft sound, Yanzhi put the armor’s belt aside and, just as he was about to reach out and grasp it, Xiao Cuan held his face.
While reviewing the memorials, Xiao Cuan used his thumb to push open the corner of Yanzhi’s lips, reaching into his mouth and pressing down on his tongue, seemingly asking casually: “Did you eat the puff just now?”
“Mm…” Yanzhi replied indistinctly with his mouth open. “Your Majesty’s reward.”
“I’ll reward you with another one.” Xiao Cuan pressed the back of his head, teaching him to lower his head. “Use your mouth.”
“Eat it just like you ate the puff.”